My 1986 Pet Shop BoyI was listening to "10 at 10",A daily music retrospective. This time the year was 1986. A Pet Shop Boys song came on And I got all watery in the eyes Remembering you. From the first When I was with you, I felt a little extra comfortable And able to be myself. I was surprised That I could calmly Suggest we get together Explore, and see what developed. Asking you out on a date While not freaking out inside Was a milestone for me. I remember hanging out at your place Before you were out to your roomates. How patient I had to be Avoiding display Of affection for you In front of them. Eventually we got more overt. We did it in the middle of the floor In the appartment of our host At a gay collegiate conference. I have fond memories Of that night. I remember the great massages And other things we shared. You turned me on to The Pet Shop Boys, The Wooden Tops, The Housemartins, And many others. They all remind me of you. You reminded me of Neil Tennant. You're both sensitive, down to earth, unassuming, and cute. I regret that we never clicked as boyfriends. "Why not?" long ago I asked. "I think you know," you answered. I never did. I remember calling you Several times from weddings. Quite tipsy I was. Feeling sad I'd not found More for myself Than what we'd had in the past. But our courses Continue to diverge. I've quit receiving changes of address Or phone number updates from you. I think your email has finally changed. You were always one Who had no trouble letting go of people. I'm not that way. I expect I'll always want To keep in touch with you. You were very special To me long ago. Neither of us can be sure If my desire to keep in touch Comes from what I can give to you, Or from a desire to live out What I thought in the past We could have together. But I'm a poet And a romantic. And nowadays yours is one of many Stories I tell of special people. I look forward to communion With new special people In the future Even while I look backward with nostalgia On the togetherness of our past. |
| 14 October 2000 revised 25 December 2001 |
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| by Bill Cattey |